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Sunday, November 18, 2007

Askew

I am feeling quite askew this weekend. I don't know how much of it is a function of being tired, how much may be a result of the prednisone I've been on this week, and how much is due to the phase of the moon, but I am quite off-kilter. I've been having vividly disturbing dreams wherein the kids are hurt in horrific ways and I must force myself awake with a jolt in order to know for sure that it's not really happening.

I don't like it.

I've been trying to jar myself back into alignment by keeping busybusybusy this weekend. Yesterday I baked (and froze) this multi-component cake for Thursday's pig-out feast, corralled the kids into doing some household chores, cleaned off the over-burdened craft shelves (mostly by dumping 18 months worth of drawings into bags for recycling), hauled a Mazda Protege-full of papers to the recycle center, grocery shopped, printed invitations to our holiday open house and our family Chanukah party, ran three loads of laundry, and oversaw homework. Today I went to the wholesale club and to Target, made huge batches of creme anglaise and raspberry sauce (for eventual use on Friday), menu-planned the holiday open house, visited with my brother, ran a fourth load of laundry, and made this season's first fire in the fireplace.

It's not working. When I lie on the floor in front of the fireplace, the room spins. I am riddled with anxiety over I-know-not-what. On the theory that a moving target gathers no moss (or something), I have a feeling I'm going to keep being busy until it goes away.

Send tequila and Ambien.

1 comment:

Vinkus07 said...

I've been having a similar issue with dreams lately, & have found that it was helpful to upset my sleeping schedule. Sounds unhealthy on the surface - but if you can bear it, stay up later or go to bed earlier. I've found it conclusively helpful.

Best,
-Ripley