Yesterday I was trying to make an appointment with my new acupuncturist for after work, and he asked me what was the earliest I could make it without hurrying. And I realized, I am never not hurrying. Hurry is my default mode. I'm either hurrying or I'm asleep (or trying to get to sleep).
My first reaction to this realization was, holy crap, I'm always hurrying, I really ought to do something about that. Find more zen in my life. But then I thought, hold it, do I really have to be more zen? Hurrying seems to work for me. Maybe the healthier thing to do would be to embrace that truth and not feel bad that I'm not more zen? When did zen become the default goal we should all strive for?
I do wonder.